… I was balancing a vodka, a whiskey, and a wine in one hand, three beers in the other, and was pouring some Peruvian corn port shots out along the dash. This was foolish because I needed at least two hands free to make horrendous finger gestures, and another to throw empties into the yards I was racing through on my way home…
… the next day police found me at an equality rally for ≠ signs. I’d only had eleventy-threenty-six twelvety twelve twelve seventy-five-hundredy-twelve eight eight ninety thirteenty-one beers, and I wasn’t even drunk. I had six beers in my chest pocket of my T-shirt…
My name’s Guy and hi. This is a tale of a few of my lives in the old student days. With little gnomes in jelly. And slamming whirlwinding metal gigs…
Jadual kandungan
CONTENTS
How to Read a Book
Friday Night
Recessions
The Rest of My Friday Night
Saturday Night
How to Be an Extremely Healthy Food and Fitness Guru and Get Me Rich Quick Spiritually
How to Cope with Writer’s Block
INTERVENTION
How to Be the Best World in the Writer
Politics, Inventions, and UFOs
War on the Lower Class
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