Bert Leston Taylor 
The Log of the Water Wagon, or The Cruise of the Good Ship ‘Lithia’ [EPUB ebook] 

Excerpt: “To all surviving saloon passengers of the good ship Lithia, who have rounded the Horn and passed through perilous Beering Straits, and suffered shipwreck, shock, and sudden thirst: to those intrepid souls who have clung to the slippery hull of the Water Wagon when it seemed the gallant craft could not live another hour; who, lashed to the sprinkler, have ridden out many a choking dust-storm; who have heard the cafe Lorelei sing, and still hung on, deaf to her seductive song: and— To the memory of countless thousands lost at sea, swept into the seething drink without a word of warning, cut off in the blossoms of their resolutions, and sent to their slate accounts with all their imperfections on their heads— This little volume is affectionately dedicated.’