Stephen Clarke 
Year In The Merde [EPUB ebook] 
The pleasures and perils of being a Brit in France

What are the French really like?Paul West, a young Englishman arriving in Paris to start a new job, is about to find out. _________________They do eat a lot of cheese, some of which smells like pigs droppings.They don t wash their armpits with garlic soap.Going on strike really is the second national participation sport after petanque.And, yes, they do use suppositories. Less quaint than A Year in Provence, less chocolatey than Chocolat, A Year in the Merde will tell you how to get served by the grumpiest Parisian waiter; how to make perfect vinaigrette every time; how to make amour — not war; and how not to buy a house in the French countryside.