Are you a victim of domestic abuse? Or do you desire to stop abusing your intimate partner? Do you simply want to understand what motivates an abuser to reoffend? If so, this ground-breaking book is for you.
With their innovative approach, clinical psychologist Indira Haracic-Novic and men’s health expert Dean Quirke shed new light on the epidemic of domestic violence against women.
Instead of viewing spousal or intimate partner abuse as the sole result of power and control tactics, the authors invite readers to explore the repetitive patterns of abusive behaviour – which tend to escalate in frequency and severity – within a behavioural addiction paradigm.
They have consolidated their expertise in this book, assisting victims to heal from the trauma of abuse, and to prevent it from happening in future relationships.
Reaching out to men who want to stop abusing their loved ones, Haracic-Novic and Quirke also provide strategies to break free from their repetitive patterns of abusive behaviour. By dismantling the dangerous aspects of the personality that may have become addicted to abusing their partners, victims and abusers become free to create healthier loving relationships.
Awarded honourable mention at the International Paris Book Festival. What the judges had to say: ‘ Abuse is the hidden secret in many families. It most often takes place in private, and can continue for years, with many people affected and lives ruined.
Toxic Love examines the root causes of abuse in a sometimes stunning work by clinical psychologist Indira Haracic-Novic and behavioral expert Dean Quirke. They define and examine this oft-hidden world, answering fundamental questions that can be applied to victims and abusers alike. It is a dense book, reflecting the deep knowledge of its authors, but it remains extremely readable and never lapses into academic piffle.
Readers will be drawn into a broader understanding of the motivations of abuse, even addressing what it means if you, the reader, are the violator. The goal is recognition of the triggers for such behavior, with the hope that understanding the ‘why’ of abusive behavior may help curb it before it escalates. By identifying it, the authors hope to break the cycle for future relationships.
Such chapters as ‘Why Do We Need a Father?’ and ‘The Feminine and Masculine in All of Us’ touch a nerve in relationship psychology. The wish is that this book gains widespread acceptance in popular culture, helping to end the epidemic patterns of abuse experienced by so many. Healing always starts somewhere, and a broader discussion of its birthing issues is of benefit to all.’
The judges also recommend that Toxic Love become a part of the Red Bench initiative, which supports charities that combat gender violence. They have advocated that authors Dean Quirke and Indira Haracic-Novic create a program that can be used by companies to educate employees on the key lessons of the book, and/or have companies pre-purchase bulk copies for distribution to accompany a video program.
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Dr Juliette Lachemeier is managing editor of the editing and independent publishing business, The Erudite Pen.